However, this may be different for others. Personally, my arousals and erections have lessened on subsequent cuddles as my body gets used to the experience. Again, don’t panic as this only happened on my first time. I won’t lie: my first bro cuddle produced some unpleasant blue balls. I’ve also gotten erections when my puppy has snuggled into me, but that doesn’t mean I’m joining “Your Other Beastialities” any time soon.
In my case, I think it’s just how my body reacts to affection. Don’t panic! That doesn’t automatically mean the physical experience is an inherently sexual one. I’m going to put it bluntly: arousal and erections do happen during cuddling. If you cuddle someone without taking the time to build a proper relationship or form any sort of emotional intimacy, then the experience may very well become the platonic version of sex on the first date. Not only will the temptation to sexualize cuddling be lessened, but the experience will also be far more beautiful and meaningful. Make sure you have a good foundation with this other person even better if you truly love him. Just because you meet another SSA guy who likes to cuddle doesn’t mean that you should. I’ve heard many unfortunate stories of men overeagerly meeting with each other just to cuddle - only to cross over into sexual territory. Bro cuddling is better with established relationships. Whatever agreement you reach together, be respectful of each other’s wishes and stick to your boundaries. In my case, I’m good for just about anything other than genital contact - which is pretty much a no-brainer. What positions are okay and not okay? What parts of the body are off-limits?įor example, I’ve had guys tell me they’re uncomfortable with spooning. However, make sure you set boundaries in the areas of cuddling too. But how comfortable are you with touch?”ĭepending on your friend’s response, you two may figure out that you both want to cuddle each other. “Hey, physical touch is very important to me. Even though it’s a bit awkward, it’s a good idea to say something along the lines of: Maybe you wanna have a sleepover or spend time somewhere just the two of you. Say you’ve met another SSA guy (or if you’re lucky enough, a touchy-feely straight guy), and you’ve hung out a bit with him. Establish your boundaries before bro cuddling. So, here now are Eugene Heffron’s 5 tips for bro cuddling. Make of them what you will.
Cuddle culture, however, is quite common in “Side B / SSA” men’s groups, and I feel it should be discussed. But I realize it may not be the same for everyone. For me personally, bro cuddling has been a very helpful and wonderful thing. Some might be reading this with reservations, or maybe you can’t wait to have your first cuddle.īefore you eagerly set out to find your first cuddle buddy, though, I’d recommend reading these basic pointers and guidelines based on my own past experiences with bro cuddling.īefore I begin, I’d like to give the disclaimer that I am not making the case that all SSA men - or men in general - should cuddle. I can say with absolute certainty that these moments have been some of the most beautiful, moving, and totally platonic expressions of intimate love I’ve ever experienced. I’ve cuddled with many fantastic men, all same-sex attracted (SSA). In my last post, I talked about “bro cuddling” and some of my past bro cuddling experiences.